Let Me Vanish
by waterrain
Summary: Prussia wants to join the other fallen Nations,but Spain won't let him. In the past Russia wouldn't let Prussia vanish despite how much the red eyed male wanted to be gone from the world. Germany in the past and present won't let his bruder vanish.


**I do not own Axis Powers Hetalia. Please Review and Thank You. Warning Rape, Torture, and other stuff.**

**_Prussia's Memories_**

**Let Me Vanish**

**By waterrain**

**_"The Nation of Prussia no longer exists. There is no East Germany and West Germany. There is just one Germany and that is me." Germany said in frustration, he looked at his older bruder, and the blue eyed Nation sighed deeply to himself. " Sometimes I do not know what to do with you, bruder. You decided to cook and somehow burned down my house." _**

Prussia was laying on his back naked on Spain's bed, his body felt hot, and he couldn't think. There was empty of bottles/cans of beer, wine, vodka, and whiskey littering the floor of Spain's bedroom. There was also broken pieces of glass from the bottles of vodka, whiskey, and wine.

The red eyed male didn't care and his eyes were half-lidded. He briefly wondered why he didn't end up like Rome, Ancient Egypt, Ancient Greece, and others. He recalled what Germany had said to him just the other day. It was just one of many memories that makes him wonder why he is still alive.

**_"You do nothing. You just eat, shower, write on your blog, use the bathroom, shower, drink alcohol, and sleep." Germany snapped angrily and his arms were crossed. "So is it too much of me to ask you to pick up some sausages?"_**

**_"Leave me alone." Prussia muttered sleepily and he turned over._**

**_"No, I want you to be useful instead of being useless. You do not clean up after yourself. Sometimes I wish you were not my bruder so I wouldn't have to put up with you." Germany stated firmly and he sighed to himself while shaking his head._**

**_"Then let me die, West." Prussia said bluntly, he rolled out of bed, and looked at his younger bruder. "And you wouldn't have to worry about me. You would be free and I would join Rome along with other fallen Nations." _**

**_Germany grabbed him tightly around the wrists and looked at Prussia._**

**_"Nein, I don't want you to be gone forever." Germany commented and that was when the red eyed male laughed loudly._**

Prussia reached weakly for the box of alcohol filled chocolate that laid by his side, he grabbed several of them, pulled them up to his mouth, and stuffed his mouth. Silent tears were falling down his flushed cheeks and eyes closed tightly.

**_The Berlin Wall fell and Germany saw his older bruder for the first time in years._**

**_"You know before Russia got me. I had slit my wrists with my sword, took two cyanide capsules, and shot myself in the heart." Prussia commented to Germany and he didn't noticed the horrified expression that his younger bruder gave him. "I was afraid of what Russia would do to me."_**

**_"Can you believe I did all that, but yet it didn't work and Russia had got me." Prussia said bitterly and his eyes were tightly closed. "It was pure hell. He didn't let me die or vanish."_**

**_"He rap-" Germany started to say, but he was cut off._**

**_"Not just once. That lousy Russian tortured me, raped me, and forced me to eat some food every single damn day." Prussia told him angrily and he was suddenly hugged tightly by the blue eyed Nation. _**

**_"We are together now." Germany said softly and that was when Prussia hugged him back. Tears ran down quietly both of their cheeks._**

Spain walked into his bedroom, he saw Prussia laying down naked on his bed, and how incredibly messy his bedroom become when he was gone.

"Prussia-" Spain started to say in a worried voice.

"I'm not Prussia anymore. There are no more Prussians." Prussia said in a slurred voice and his red eyes still closed tightly. Spain walked carefully over to him, he sat down on the bed, and looked down at his friend.

"I'm not needed anymore. I do not do anything and I'm fucking worthle-" Prussia managed to say fiercely, but couldn't finish for Spain kissed him firmly on the lips and after a moment pulled away.

"The world doesn't need me, but yet I'm still here." Prussia said quietly and he felt Spain gently laying down on top of him.

"Because you are too awesome to die. The other Nations that fell are gone forever, but not you." Spain commented cheerfully and he wiped Prussia's tear stained cheeks. "You won't ever vanish."

"Sometimes I hate it. I remember when I actually mattered and how strong I use to be…" Prussia muttered bitterly and he closed his eyes again.

"My status as a world power was destroyed when England defeated my armada. The present and future holds more meaning than the past." Spain said calmly as he stroked Prussia's wet and flushed cheeks.

"I have no damn future. I only have the past. You still have people, Spain. There are no Prussians. I feel so cold and empty at times for I have no people." Prussia commented to him and he felt Spain's body moving off of him.

Spain took off his shirt and pants with ease. He laid back down on Prussia, his eyes were serious as he looked into those red eyes, and he put his lips near Prussia's right ear.

"Everyone has a future." Spain whispered calmly and he felt his friend shudder slightly.

"Don't whisper near my ear." Prussia managed to say and he was lost inside of his own mind. More memories he had blocked away came without mercy.

**_"East without me doing this to you. You be gone completely. I could have let you die, da. I'm being kind." The violet eyed Nation told him softly and his hand held Prussia's wrists together in a tight grip._**

**_"You are wrong, Russia. You are being cruel. I want to die." Prussia said in between sobs, his whole body was bloodied, bruised, and Russia was still moving inside of his unwilling body._**

**_"No one wants to die." Russia commented calmly and he smiled innocently. "You allowed your own brother have sex with you once a year."_**

**_"Surely your little brother would have grown tired of having sex with you. If he did not have sex with you once a year then you would have vanished. I forced Germany to tell me one of his deepest darkest secret which is him having sex with you once a year to keep you from disappearing." Russia whispered softly by Prussia's right ear and he kissed the red eyed male on the cheek._**

"I can help you." Spain said to Prussia and he noticed that tears were falling again from those red eyes. "No one wants to die."

_**"I won't let you vanish, East." Russia said gently, a twisted smile on his lips, and he entered inside of Prussia roughly.**_

_**"Nein, I want to die. You damn twisted commie." Prussia managed to say and he was kissed deeply by Russia.**_

_**"Be quiet, da." Russia commented smoothly and he tilted his head. "Unless I tell you to talk. I don't mind if you scream, cry, or moan."**_

"Nein, I want to vanish." Prussia said out loud, but he was not heard and Spain was smiling at him.

"All you need is a Nation to be inside of you and fill you up." Spain commented smoothly, he moved his vital regions against Prussia's lower area, and held Prussia's wrists together.

_**"Bruder, It is okay." Germany said calmly and he added firmly. "I won't let you vanish. You can be annoying at times, but I do not wish you dead."**_

_**Prussia smiled faintly, he looked at the blue eyed Nation, and chuckled to himself.**_

_**"So you won't let the awesome me die." Prussia commented calmly and he had a gulp of beer. "Even though you have to fuck me once a year to keep me from ending up like the other fallen Nations."**_

_**"You are crude." Germany informed him before kissing him on the lips and took off Prussia's outfit.**_

"Why can't anyone let my awesome self be gone from this world." Prussia muttered to himself and he tried to move, but his body felt too weak and tired.

"Whether you want it or not. I'm going to help you." Spain told him in a serious voice and he smiled brightly. "Don't worry I won't hurt you, Prussia. I want to make sure you do not disappear."

**_"I'm not risking you disappearing from the world, East. Every day I will have sex with you. Be grateful I won't let you die, da." Russia said to Prussia cheerfully and a twisted smile was on his lips. "I refuse to ever let you vanish my beloved little East."_**

Tears fell down Prussia's half-lidded red eyes and traveled down his flushed cheeks. His sobs were muffled by Spain's burning lips, he was hard, and so was Spain.

**_"So easy to enter and invade, da. It is a pity you no longer scream or cry when I move inside of you." Russia whispered softly and then added innocently. "Me having sex with you is better than your younger brother having with you. After all you and I are not related. So it is not sickening incest sex."_**

**_Prussia was chained to the wall, his body thinner, and red eyes looked at the violet eyed Nation with defiance._**

**_"I would rather have West inside of me than you." Prussia managed to say and he was hit by Russia's pipe. _**

**_"One day I will be back with my little bruder." Prussia said firmly despite the fact his whole entire body was bruised, bloodied, and the only thing keeping him sane is the thought of being back with his bruder. Russia smacked him harshly and wrapped his hands around Prussia's throat._**

**_"One day that damn wall will come crashing down. I'll be free of you." Prussia told him despite losing air and his eyes rolled backwards._**

"I'm about to enter." Spain said softly to Prussia as he slowly entered and he kept on wiping the tears that fell from those red eyes. "It's going to be okay, Prussia."

Prussia was lost in the memories of his past, he could barely feel a thing, and his eyes were completely dazed.

**Please Review and Thank You. **

**Bruder is German for Brother.**

**Nein is German for No.**

**A common method of suicide was cyanide poisoning. Many Germans hoarded cyanide capsules in anticipation of the Allied occupation. Suicide levels reached their maximum in Berlin in April of 1945 when 3,881 people killed themselves during the Battle of Berlin.**


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